Movie Reviews
Hey folks I hope everyone is doing well!
I once again apologize for the lack of reviews, so much has happened at once. I got COVID a third time and my computer broke, both happening right after each other. I am luckily getting better, i definitely will have a lot to catch up on.
I’ll be returning with reviews soon, thank you for your patience!
Choose Or Die is a prime example of taking a concept and having piss poor execution, outside of Asa Butterfield and Lola Evans performances and their awkward chemistry between one another. The rest of the movie feels completely manufactured and doesn’t try make a thrilling atmosphere, it plays out a lot like a teen horror movies like Truth or Dare (2018) rather than go for suspense or have a great setup it goes for the bare minimum with it’s premise and comes off incredibly goofy. What really hurts Choose Or Die is the writing, between the shoehorned romance of the characters, the nonexistent character development and the lack of payoff with the kills. The movie does very little to justify it’s build up to the third act which is a whole other problem. The third act has no idea what it want’s to be, it’s way too silly to be taken seriously and it certainly isn’t in the campy type feel or a case where it could be laughably bad. There’s some fine enough visuals here and there but they are barely given enough time to shine due to the pacing, I definitely think Choose Or Die would have been far more successful as a short film or mini-series. There’s just not enough here to create a full narrative without shoehorning underdeveloped elements or resulting to very poor writing.
Choose Or Die is available on Netflix.
2/10 F
Cheaper By The Dozen (2022) is a prime example of a remake that did not need to happen, the best thing I can say about this movie is the acting isn’t as bad as you would expect. Sure nobody gives a performance that I would call great but this does lead to some charming moments that at least give the movie some heart in it. Outside of that however the rest of the movie is basically a bad Disney channel original movie disguised as a Disney+ Original, it feels very much like a sitcom which isn’t necessarily always a bad thing but in this case it goes for one that’s just not funny at all. Which leads into the biggest problem with this movie…the writing and jokes, think of any bad family movie from the early 2000s and then think about the humor that were in those movies. That’s the type of humor Cheaper By The Dozen consists of, which quickly grows both tired and incredibly annoying. If I had to compare this to another recent Disney+ Original it would have to be last year’s Home Sweet Home Alone another pointless reimagining/reboot/remake/I have no idea. Only that one was far far worse, but both movies share this type of feel that Disney looked around the library and randomly two movies to give the Disney+ treatment. I really don’t have much else to say Cheaper By The Dozen (2022) is very bare bones and does nothing interesting I’m not going to pretend like the 2003 movie was a masterpiece but at least it was entertaining, this one not so much.
Cheaper By The Dozen is available on Disney+
3/10 D-
Hello again and welcome to part 2 of the worst list. Last time was pretty straightforward, we haven’t gotten to the REALLY bad movies quite yet, we are still in the range of “a few positives but overall forgettable and not good”. Let’s continue on shall we?
74. Don’t Breathe 2 – Trust me I wanted to put this so much lower on the list, but there are a couple positives that are keeping this movie afloat. Stephen Lang does a decent job and the kills are actually pretty neat. Unfortunately Don’t Breathe 2 completely goes against everything that made the first film so great, it tries to turn Stephen Lang’s character into an anti-hero but completely fails at doing that. It’s also one of those horror sequels that feels completely empty, which is incredibly disappointing.
73. Diary Of A Wimpy Kid – As I said in my review this is basically the live action 2010 movie but In animated form and it’s somehow worse, I honestly couldn’t believe how bare bones this actually felt when I watched it, it doesn’t have the charm, humor or fun factor the 2010 did. Really don’t have much else to add on.
72. Voyagers – Remember when this came out? No? Well me neither, it was until I actually read my review for it that I start to remember it. There was a giant amount of potential here but the movie is basically Lord Of The Flies but in space and it’s nowhere near as interesting. The acting and writing both fall incredibly flat and the direction is all over the place, there’s some nice elements visually but that’s not nearly enough to recommend this.
71. Snake Eyes – I’ll give the movie this…it’s the best G.I.Joe movie!! Henry Golding is actually not too bad as Snake Eyes, however like some of the other action movies I’ve talked about so far on this list it suffers some of the same problems. The action scenes are horribly filmed due to the very shaky camera, it’s almost next to impossible to make out what’s going on. Lastly the movie just feels like another terrible summer action blockbuster, it does nothing to differentiate among others unfortunately.
70. Spirit Untamed – My main question after watching this movie was “why?” Plus I really don’t exactly know what to say here, it’s a bad animated movie that tries to please fans of the original movie and tries to please fans of the Netflix series. I really don’t know what else to say here.
69. Seance – Simon Barrett is very talented it’s just a shame his talent wasn’t shown in this movie.
68. Agnes – Outside of some decent performances from Molly C. Quinn and Hayley McFarland the movie ends up being a complete and total mess. It feels like two completely different movies the first half being a laughably bad horror movie and the second half feeling like a nothing special about it drama. Sean Gunn for whatever reason shows up.
67. Butchers – Discount Wrong Turn with some good gore…Next.
66. A Glitch In The Matrix – A interesting premise for a documentary that sadly feels uninformative, it uses no factual evidence instead it uses YouTube videos or videos from other sites that have been debunked numerous times. There’s a few cool bits in there such as some neat robot costumes that I’m sure had a lot of work put into them. You will more than likely get more out of a conspiracy theory post from Reddit than this movie.
65. Last Call – A terrible comedy that has some decent acting but unfortunately follows some exact same plot lines as other movies only it does them worse.
64. Thunder Force – This is another attempt by Netflix to try and capitalize off of the superhero genre…if you have seen any Ben Falcone and Melissa McCarthy comedy you have already seen this one, Octavia Spencer and Melissa McCarthy actually try their best with what they are given and the movie itself isn’t as bad as some of Falcone’s other movies. But it’s still a very unfunny mess that uses the same old jokes (McCarthy falling over) as the other movies do, the superhero elements are very surface level and don’t add anything to the movie.
Now we are getting into the next tier of movies which this one is “movies that have one or two positives but are ultimately really bad”
63. Falling – I can perfectly understand why someone may like this movie, however it completely falls flat for me. The only huge positive I can give this movie is the acting is quite great. The problem is the writing and messaging of the movie comes off as very awkward and quite uncomfortable (and not in the good way) lots of slurs, racism and so on is spewed and the problem is the movie tries to justify this by having a very half ass lesson about forgiveness. It isn’t explored not nearly enough to have a conversation about it, ultimately very forgettable.
62. Dreamcatcher – A very empty slasher film that presents very interesting ideas such as taking place at a music festival. But it doesn’t do anything with that concept and goes in the traditional bad slasher movie route.
The next batch of movies are ones I didn’t give a full review to for obvious reasons so excuse the very short segments. (skip to #56 if you want to see the longer segments again.)
61. The Last Mercenary – A terrible French comedy that has Jean-Claude Van Damme, very unintentionally hilarious but definitely not a good movie at all.
60. Held – Discount Saw movie, only positive to say is the acting. Otherwise it’s Saw but more stupid.
59. Paranormal Prison – A terrible found footage horror movie that for some reason gives the characters uninteresting and long backstories.
58. The Devil Below – Really not much to say here, The Devil Below is about as painfully nothing special as you can get, it starts out way too slow and never picks up until the tip end of the second act. But by then the movie has already lost your interest, the writing is horrible and predictable the acting ranges from bad to very below average.
57. Vanquish – This was a movie I felt like putting much lower on the list, but it does have it’s positives such as Ruby Rose, Morgan Freeman and the surprisingly decent cinematography. Like the last four entrees this is yet another movie I did not give a full review and rightfully so. It’s another terrible action thriller from Lionsgate that has big name stars to sucker you into watching it.
56. Tom and Jerry – I was heavily debating if I should keep where this movie is or put it lower on the list, but when compared to some of the other movies that will appear later on the list it seems like a masterpiece. Anyways Tom And Jerry is actually looked somewhat decent from the trailers but unfortunately falls into the early 2000s family movie hole and not in a good way, between the movie opening with a rapping bird, the unfunny jokes that are told every 0.2 seconds and the acting even from great performers such as Chloe Grace Moretz and Michael Peña feeling incredibly phoned in. The movie is a huge mess that completely misses the point of what made the original Tom And Jerry cartoon so loved, giving this project to Tim Story was a huge mistake.
55. Mainstream – is a movie that should have been really good, Nat Wolff and Andrew Garfield are both great here. But unfortunately this movie feels like if that one kid in computer class who always made their project filled with flash effects made a movie. The social media aspect is incredibly outdated and is very weak when compared to other films that have tackled the social media subject so much better.
54. Finding You – 119 minutes of a whole lot of nothing, the writing is the worst part about this movie. It feels like someone wrote a fanfiction and accidentally sent it to a film studio, way too many subplots happen with very little conclusion and you have uninteresting characters.
53. Outside The Wire – Anthony Mackie and Damson Idris have great chemistry and both gave genuinely decent performances, but like some of the other Netflix films I’ve talked about so far on this list it feels very bare bones. Between uneven pacing and very cliched characters, this is one that did have potentially but ultimately missed it’s mark.
52. Prey – A terrible survival movie that does nothing new for the genre (yet another one I didn’t give a full review)
51. The Ice Road – Liam Neeson has his good performances and his bad ones….this is one of the bad ones, an action thriller that feels almost identical to every single one of the movies Neeson has been in the last 7 years. The movie tries to ground itself as realistic but throws every ridiculous scene that comes right out of nowhere. The best way to describe The Ice Road is if The LifeTime Channel decided to make action films instead of whatever the hell they make.
50. Black As Night – Here is the other “Welcome To The Blumhouse” movie that made the list. Black As Night tries to be a clone of Vampires Vs The Bronx, from the jokes, to plot elements and so on. It feels like any other vampire movie you have seen before but only done far worse. The action scenes aren’t too bad but everything else is very disposable and just not at all worth looking in to.
And that is it for part 2, I wanted to make this part very straightforward as it was the middle of the list and as you can see a bunch of the entrees were short. Next time we will cover #49-#26!
So here we are again another year finished, so it means end of the year lists time. I do want to point out that this is going to be the last year where I’m doing a worst list…and no it isn’t because it’s “too negative” or a bunch of people on Twitter complain about worst lists. It’s that I’ve been finding it very hard to do them the last couple years. What I will do starting next year and going forward is list a bunch of terrible movies that pissed me off and put it into one post. I’m only doing a worst list this year because of a few movies that we will get to later on. Now unfortunately there’s two movies that couldn’t make the list due to them not releasing this year which they are Asking For it and Mother Schmuckers two movies I saw at festivals this year. Had they come out this year both of them would have made at least the top 20 but still would not have touched number 1. Outside of that the only other rule I’m including is movies that I’ve seen, which by this point should be obvious. One last thing, we are going to plow through the first several entrees on the list mainly due to there really not having a whole lot to say about some movies, there will be definitely cases where I’ll go into detail about other films. Anyway let’s get started..
100. The Seventh Day – This is one of those movies where I didn’t even bother to give it a full review and for a good reason. It’s the most lazy type of Exorcism film you can think of, everything you think is going to happen does in fact happen. The few saving graces about this movie is Guy Pearce (for some reason he’s in this), Stephen Lang and the writing not being the complete worst.
99. Cherry – Cherry is one of the biggest disappointments of the year, it’s not entirely bad Tom Holland is clearly trying his best with a very surface level script, Ciara Bravo’s performance is just downright painful to watch and listen to and then there’s the pacing that’s incredibly slow. Ultimately what lands Cherry on this list is how much of a complete and total mess it really is, there were way too many ideas thrown into the movie yet none of them were presented in a compelling or interesting way.
98. The Starling – Speaking of disappointing movies here’s another one. I really wanted The Starling to be another “Can You Ever Forgive Me?” Moment for Melissa McCarthy, unfortunately that’s not what happened here. While yes Melissa McCarthy and Chris O’Dowd both give genuinely good performances they also have great chemistry with one another. As well as some very decent music as well. What kills The Starling is how it tries to be both a film about a tragic loss and a comedy, the movie doesn’t do that well at all. It’s as I said in my review, one moment you have a scene talking about a tragic death and in the very next scene you have Melissa McCarthy getting attacked by CGI birds. The comedic tone just overshadows the rest of the movie unfortunately.
97. First Date – I’m still trying to figure out what exactly they were going for with this one, it has a promising start but quickly falls into the “terrible” territory between characters with no development, very uneven pacing, budgetary constraints clearly holding this movie back from being decent and a very sloppily put together third act. The movie is ultimately a huge mess.
96. Caught By The Wave – God we are only four movies in and this is already the second film on the list that was released by Netflix. Long story short this is another one of those Fault in Our Stars clones or “sick boy/sick girl find love” movies. There’s literally no difference from this movie or The Fault In Our Stars except the acting isn’t as good and the writing is far weaker.
95. Black Friday – This is a prime example of a great idea done in the most laziest way possible, there’s definitely fun moments to be had. But between the characters bringing nothing new to the table and it being a horror comedy that quickly runs out of steam. It ends up being a complete and total mess. Bruce Campbell and Michael Jai White are the best parts about this one.
94. Trust – Yet another movie I didn’t give a full review and yeah I can see why. Victoria Justice does her best but the plot makes little to no sense and character development is nowhere to be seen.
93. The Arbors – ANOTHER movie I didn’t give a full review for, this movie is pretty much any straight to VOD thriller that have come out in last 5 years. What’s baffling about this one is it’s unnecessary almost 2 hour running time.
92. Bingo Hell – Here is one of the two “Welcome To The Blumhouse” movies that made the list, while the performances from Adriana Barraza and Richard Blake were genuinely fun. The rest of the movie is a huge mess, it goes for this B movie feel but wants to take itself seriously, which is very strange considering the premise of the movie. It’s nice that they centered the movie around senior citizens however they deserved a far better movie.
91. Earwig and the Witch – Remember when this released? I completely forgot about this movie until I started making this list, this is easily the weakest of Studio Ghibli’s films and it’s not even close. The major problem with this movie is nothing happens and it goes completely against what makes Studio Ghibli so great, there’s just no magic in it’s story or characters which is truly unfortunate. I know they wanted something different with this movie, but it just backfires in every single way possible.
90. Hypnotic – Another movie I didn’t give a full review to and another Netflix movie, it’s by the same directors of “The Open House” and while it is better that doesn’t mean it’s good. It’s another thriller with good ideas but executed in a very terrible way. 
89. Here Today – The movie suffers the exact same problems as The Starling did but on a much bigger scale, Billy Crystal and Tiffany Haddish have great chemistry and give genuinely good performances. The balance of comedy and serious moments is horrendous, it ruins potentially sweet moments by making them incredibly awkward due to the humor. Very unfortunate because this could have actually been something great.
88. Mosquito State – The movie is interesting visually and has some nice stylistic choices but outside of that such as the writing it’s not strong enough to carry the movie…not much else to say here.
87. Night Teeth – A very forgettable vampire movie that made it sound like Megan Fox and Sydney Sweeney had actual big roles even though they are barely in it. What you are left with is a few decent performances from Jorge Lendeborg Jr and Debby Ryan and a few okay death scenes, it also tries to be so many different genres at once but fails.
86. A Week Away – “Christian Camp Rock” is the best way to sum up this movie, it wants to be Camp Rock so bad but completely fails. Granted there are fun moments but not nearly enough to save this movie.
85. The Virtuoso – Anthony Hopkins shitpost (he’s the only good part about this movie)
84. A Nightmare Wakes – Another movie telling the story of Mary Shelley, would be interesting if this hadn’t been done to death or the movie said something interesting. The pacing is horrendous as it doesn’t give enough time for a scene to develop.
83. An Unquiet Grave – Feels like a short film that went on for way too long, despite it being 72 minutes it feels way too long due to very bad pacing, it has good ideas but ultimately don’t amount to anything.
82. Blithe Spirit – Outside of Judi Dench and the production design this movie feels like a chore to sit through, really not much else to say.
81. Enhanced – This is literally low budget X-Men combined with any Sci-Fi film you have seen before.
80. Yes Day – I can’t believe people are still putting The Gummy Bear song in movies in 2021 but here we are, outside of Jenna Ortega and Jennifer Garner everything else in this movie is just bad. It feels like a terrible early 2000s family movie that somehow got released in 2021. The director Miguel Areta who did Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day directed this movie. Which despite the movie having no relation to Alexander they feel like almost identical movies.
79. A House On The Bayou – Spoiler alert all three of the Blumhouse and EPIX film collaborations made the list, House On The Bayou is the least bad of the three but is still a complete total mess. The acting is laughably bad, the writing is terrible and feels like the equivalent of an essay that starts out really good and understandable but then out of nowhere it becomes a pile of complete nonsense.
78. Demonic – A lot of people probably expected this to appear much later on the list given my review, however while it is indeed bad there’s far worse. Neil Blomkamp was once one of those directors that a lot of people were predicting to have this “best working today” status but slowly that started to fade away. I was excited for Demonic since it was his first full length feature since 2015. Like Chappie this movie falls into the exact same hole, having very interesting ideas but executing them poorly, the whole dreamscape demonic possession ends up turning into something that’s all too familiar. And the script doesn’t give the actors enough to work with, it’s such a bare bones movie and has nothing to add to the already crowded demonic possession genre.
77. Jolt – The Taken 3 effect is in full force with this movie, make your action scenes as unrecognizable as possible and have some painful to watch editing that ultimately hurts the viewer’s head. Outside of a few moments and Kate Beckinsale there really isn’t anything too this movie. Finally the movie ends up being another action movie that does nothing new at all.
76. Kate – I put Kate and Jolt next to each other because they are almost identical, Jolt being the better of the two but not by much. The problem with Kate is like Jolt feels like every single action movie that came before it, Mary Elizabeth Winstead and Woody Harrelson are both great but that’s where the movie ends in terms of positives, Kate is ultimately an action movie with a very weak script that doesn’t offer anything new to the genre.
75. The Woman In The Window – For the final entree of the first part of the worst list we are going to end on this one. This is one of those movies that was stuck limbo thanks to COVID-19 it was eventually released by Netflix, which ended up being one of the most disappointing movies of 2021, it’s basically another Rear Window but worse. I’ll give the movie this it has some “it’s so bad it’s hilarious moments” but that isn’t enough to save this movie what ultimately saves this movie from being any lower on the list is the third act…in seconds it goes from a very uninteresting Rear Window clone to a hilariously bad movie that you could laugh at with friends. The characters are terrible, the suspense is nonexistent and the writing is just downright awful.
And that’s it for the first part of the list! The next part will cover 74-50! Stay tuned!!
Those of you who have followed me or have known me for awhile know that I used to do these types of lists quite a lot! Unfortunately yesterday got completely messed up with everything getting delayed or just refusing to come out I had to stop the lists for awhile. Luckily this year I can finally continue!! So here is what to look forward to this month!
The second part of the Euphoria special is my most anticipated, I absolutely loved the first part and I seriously can’t wait to see what they do next with it! There’s a few award season films coming out this month such as Pieces Of Woman, One Night In Miami, and MLK/FBI. All of which I hear are really good! The Euphoria second special premiers January 24th, Pieces Of Woman streams on Netflix January 7th, MLK/FBI goes on VOD January 15th and One Night In Miami goes on Amazon Prime Video January 15th
HBO Max’s first film of the Warner Bros 2021 deal is this month which is The Little Things, which looks incredibly solid and has a lot of potential to be quite interesting! The Little Things premiers on HBO Max January 29th
Surprisingly the Wrong Turn franchise returns with a reboot, but is one night only on January 26th!
Rest of the films and their release dates
The Reason I Jump – January 8th (Virtual)
Herself – January 8th (Amazon Prime Video)
#Like – January 8th (Virtual) also January 26th (VOD)
Hunted – January 14th (Shudder)
Downfalls High – January 15th (VOD)
Our Friend – January 22nd (VOD)
PG: Psycho Goreman – January 22nd (VOD)
Penguin Bloom – January 27th (VOD or Netflix) it’s kind of unclear.
Supernova – January 29th (Theater)
The Night January 29th (VOD)
Palmer – January 29th (Apple TV+)
The Dig – January 29th (Netflix)
Alright so I’m getting a lot of questions regarding my end of the year lists and what movies are being counted as 2020 films. This year I will be doing a top 100 worst and best films of 2020, I thought I would do something a bit different! However I won’t be starting the two lists until I see these final 12 movies (already seen Minari and Nomadland just haven’t reviewed them yet) I will scrap some off the list if it takes way too long for the movies to come out online. The list can be found here https://boxd.it/auPZ6
Minari, Nomadland and The Father will be counted as 2020 films, all three films have been getting nominated across the board so it would make zero sense to say they are 2021 films. Plus Minari and Nomadland did get virtual screenings, also the reason why I haven’t reviewed Minari and Nomadland is because I’m waiting for both of them to release to collect more thoughts, I really want to see both again! Finally there’s The Killing Of Two Lovers which I have both reviewed and watched the film itself comes out February 23rd 2021 and had a virtual screening release. The difference here is it’s not getting nominated for awards, I said I would count it as both a 2020 film and 2021 film. But I think I’m going to go ahead and count it as a 2021 film. Simply due to only being released for a week where as Nomadland and Minari got multiple screenings throughout the year!
While this is going on I will be reviewing some 2021 films as well!
It’s finally that time again for award season!! Things had to be held back due to COVID-19 but now it looks like things are in full swing. Kicking that off we have the nominations for the Gotham Awards which will be on January 11th 2021! I won’t go over every single category I’m just going to say what I’m surprised and happy about what got nominated. Also some overall thoughts about the nominations plus some other stuff. One thing I will say before starting is I’m not going to talk about roles in movies/movies I haven’t seen yet. I can’t comment on Nomadland, Chadwick Boseman’s performance in Ma Rainey’s Black Bottom, Kingsley Ben-Adir’s performance in One Night In Miami and a few others. I’ll only talk about ones I have seen which luckily I’ve seen 4/5 of the best picture nominations so let’s get started!
Best Actor
Riz Ahmed – Sound Of Metal
Chadwick Boseman – Ma Rainey’s Black Bottom
Jude Law – The Nest
John Magaro – First Cow
Jesse Plemons – I’m Thinking Of Ending Things
Of The Best Actor category I’ve seen two performances as the other films which are The Sound Of Metal, The Nest and Ma Rainey’s Black Bottom are not out yet (well The Nest is but it got a very small release it’s going on VOD November 17th) however I have seen John Magaro’s performance in First Cow and Jesse Plemons role in I’m Thinking Of Ending Things! Both of which I’m really happy got nominated. John Magaro was definitely a shoe in but I’m very surprised about Jesse Plemons, I’m Thinking Of Ending Things is a film I was 100% positive that would have a very hard time getting nominations. But here we are it got two nominations which leads into..
Best Actress!
Nicole Beharie – Miss Juneteenth
Jessie Buckley – I’m Thinking Of Ending Things
Yu-Jung-Youn – Minari
Carrie Coon – The Nest
Frances McDormand – Nomadland
Jessie Buckley was also nominated for her role in I’m Thinking Of Ending Things, I’m very happy because she absolutely killed it in her role, do I think she is going to win it? Probably not since Frances McDormand was nominated for Nomadland which I’ve heard she’s a frontrunner. However as I said before it’s still great to see a film such as I’m Thinking Of Ending things actually get recognized. And who knows anything could happen!! Also Nicole Beharie being nominated for Miss Juneteenth was a very nice surprise, I definitely feel like that’s one of the most underrated roles of the year so far.
Breakthrough Actor
Sidney Flanigan – Never Rarely Sometimes Always
Jasmine Batchelor – The Surrogate
Kelly O’Sullivan – Saint Frances
Orion Lee – First Cow
Kingsley Ben-Adir – One Night In Miami
Orion Lee also gets nominated for First Cow which is quite honestly one of my favorite nominations, Orion Lee I knew would be nominated. First Cow is truly an incredible film that shows Orion Lee’s acting ability! Sidney Flanigan being nominated for Never Rarely Sometimes Always is brilliant, her performance is easily one of the best of the year and it’s not a surprise at all that she was nominated.
Best Screenplay
Bad Education – Mike Makowsky
First Cow – Jon Raymond and Kelly Reichardt
The Forty Year Old Version – Radha Blank
Fourteen – Dan Sallitt
Vast Of Night – James Montague and Craig Sanger
Let’s see we have Bad Education, First Cow and The-Forty-Year-Old Version this category (haven’t seen Fourteen or Vast Of Night) There really isn’t anything too surprising here but I am extremely happy to see The Forty Year Old Version being nominated as I said in my review Radha Blank worked extremely hard on the movie so it’s absolutely beautiful to see her being nominated.
Bingham Ray Breakthrough Director Award
Carlo Mirabella-Davis – Swallow
Rhada Blank – The Forty Year Old Version
Andrew Patterson – Vast Of Night
Channing Godfrey Peoples – Miss Juneteenth
Alex Thompson – Saint Frances
Definitely an interesting category full of choices you wouldn’t expect, Carlo Mirabella-Davis nominated for Swallow, Radha Blank nominated for The Forty Year Old Version, Channing Godfrey Peoples nominated for Miss Juneteenth and Alex Thompson nominated for Saint Frances (I haven’t seen Andrew Patterson’s Vast Of Night) as I said earlier I’m really happy Radha Blank got nominated but it’s even better to see her get nominated twice. It’s quite interesting to see Swallow be nominated, this is something I would have never guessed. But it was beautifully directed and I’m glad Mirabella-Davis is getting the recognition.
Best Documentary
76 Days
City Hall
Our Time Machine
A Thousand Cuts
Time
I’m going to breeze through this as I’ve only seen one in the this category which is Time. I reviewed this one and I still stand by what I said in my review. A truly powerful film that was definitely going to get nominated!!
Best Feature
The Assistant – Kitty Green
First Cow – Kelly Reichardt
Never Rarely Sometimes Always – Eliza Hittman
Nomadland – Chloe Zhao
Relic – Natalie Erika James
Best feature is my favorite category of the nominations, mostly because of how incredible and surprising the choices were. Nomadland and Never Rarely Sometimes Always were of course going to be both nominated. I wasn’t sure if First Cow would be nominated for best picture due to the competition, but I’m glad to see it actually got nominated!! That leaves The Assistant which is one of the best films of 2020 and one of the most horrifying as well, very smart choice! Finally there’s Relic which this is absolutely huge for the horror community. Horror films rarely EVER get nominated for best picture heck you would be lucky if one got nominated for any other category. So to see Relic which is a fantastic horror film get nominated is truly beautiful.
It’s also worth pointing out all five nominations are films by women, which given how the academy has snubbed so many talented women this is something you would never expect. 4 of the 5 films I’ve seen an each of them are incredible in their own unique way heck all they are in my top 60 best films of the year so far (I’m sure Nomadland will join them) last year on twitter people were going around saying “well maybe if women directed better films they would be nominated” funny how those exact same people are silent as a mouse now.
If the rest of the award season looks like this or something similar I think we are going to have one of the best award seasons!!
Hey everyone! This list is going to be in one post, this may come to a disappointment by some but I honestly should have done this with the worst films of the 2010s as well. I do hope you all enjoy it still!! Keep in mind the list is just my opinion!! Enjoy!!
Now we will be entering the top 100 which are the films I felt were the strongest on the list!!
Finally we are at the Final 60 which for me are considered some of the best films of all time (some of the top 100 is considered that too!)
And that is all for the list I hope you all enjoyed!!!
This is it folks the absolute worst of the worst…these are the movies that managed to achieve legendary status of how terrible they are. With that said let’s finish this!
25. Unforgettable (2017) directed by Denise Di Novi : Behold the absolute worst Fatal Attraction clone, which that is saying a lot considering how many of them were on this list! Unforgettable does everything wrong, the suspense is nonexistent, the characters are horribly written, the writing is about as interesting as a LifeTime movie. A matter of fact that’s what this movie is in disguise it should have never been in theaters and instead should have been on the LifeTime channel where it belongs. Do not even get me started on Katherine Heigl’s performance in this movie it’s HORRENDOUS!!
24. The Host (2013) directed by Andrew Niccol : When Twilight ended in 2012 it was a blow to the YA genre so they quickly thought of something for it’s replacement turns it was a movie that was a complete and total disaster it did terrible with critics and while it did pass it’s budget it did nowhere near as good as the Twilight movies did. Which is easy to see why this is basically aliens but with Twilight elements to it. The movie itself is very poorly written, acted and directed…there’s absolutely no soul put into this movie at all, The Host doesn’t do anything different than what other YA book adaptions we’re doing at the time.
23. Life Itself (2018) directed by Dan Fogelman : Life Itself is one of those movies that just gets really angry and makes you feel disgusting after watching it. The movie has a lot of tragedies that are done in extremely poor taste such as suicide (they show it in the most poor taste way I’ve ever seen in a film), getting hit by a bus, the movie justifies cheating saying if the person who cheated leaves you for someone else don’t be mad at them it’s not their fault….EXECUSE ME??? There’s so much more as well, I swear this movie is so offensive midway through the movie I actually started to feel very uncomfortable. Not even Oscar Isaac or Olivia Cooke could save this garbage, this is a movie that I was strongly considering making my worst film of 2018 when I first saw it BUT a few movies beat it which we will get to later on…
22. Movie 43 (2013) directed by Elizabeth Banks, Steven Brill, Steve Carr, Rusty Cundieff, James Duffy, Griffin Dunne, Peter Farrelly, Patrik Forsberg, Will Graham, James Gunn, Brett Ratner, Jonathan Van Tulleken and Bob Odenkirk : I present to you the worst parody movie of the 2010s, the whole gimmick of this movie was to have big names do ridiculous things. Each and every segment was more painful than the last, not one of these segments got a laugh out of me…The acting is terrible, the writing is some of the worst I’ve ever heard and the movie itself is downright painful….I really don’t have anything else to say it’s all the same thing as other parody movies.
21. The Haunting Of Sharon Tate (2019) directed by Daniel Farrands : I’m going to link my review of this movie because I really do not have much else to add here, but I will say that Daniel Farrands for whatever reason likes to turn tragedies into garbage slasher movies which is simply disgusting and this movie is no exception. The whole “what if it happened this way” narrative in this movie is just downright offensive and truly the worst thing about this movie…the link to my review is here https://letterboxd.com/jerome1994/film/the-haunting-of-sharon-tate/
20. Captive State (2019) directed by Rupert Wyatt : Again I am not going to harp on this movie too long because I really stand by my original review which I will link..You know that one person who just rants about politics but clearly does not know what they are talking? Well that’s this movie and it’s a shame because this movie could have actually been a interesting, but instead it turns to be one of the most uninteresting Sci-fi movies on the list…here is a link to my original review https://letterboxd.com/jerome1994/film/captive-state/
19. Ouija (2014) directed by Stiles White : Ouija is one of the worst horror movies out there and I have no problem saying that. Heck it’s barely a horror movie, for whatever reason there is this drama bit thrown into it that I am very sure that the audience watching does not care about at all. Acting, writing and directing wise it’s completely worthless there is absolutely no sense of direction with this movie, it’s nothing but jumpscares (yes it’s one of those movies) this is one of those movies that’s just a slap to the face of the genre…
18. Transformers Age Of Extinction (2014) (WORST OF 2014) directed by Michael Bay : So we finally made it to the first movie that was number one on of my worst of the year lists. Transformers Age Of Extinction being the least terrible out of all of them but that’s not saying much, so why is it so bad? Well first off it’s easily the worst of the franchise, second the movie adds nothing to the franchise. It regurgitates the same exact thing over and over again, the pacing combined with the running time is unforgivable. You feel every single minute and every second of pain while watching this movie, the action isn’t fun at all, the writing is the same Michael Bay humor that makes your ears bleed. At least with The Last Knight they tried a little bit, with this movie you feel that there was absolutely not attempt at trying at all.
17. Wounds (2019) directed by Babak Anvari : I really do not have anything to add with this movie so I will link my original review but I will say one thing. This is the end result when a promising director gets involved with a horrendous movie… https://letterboxd.com/jerome1994/film/wounds/
16. After Earth (2013) (WORST OF 2013) directed by M. Night Shyamalan : After Earth is next being the worst film of 2013, I remember when I saw this in theaters thinking it could have actually been a decent movie but man was I wrong. The acting was soulless and felt the actors were replaced with cardboard cutouts, the writing wasn’t engaging or interesting at the slightest. The pacing was a disaster it felt like a 3 hour long movie when it really wasn’t, luckily this is one of those movies that faded into obscurity and has never really been talked about or even mentioned ever again. In terms if this still deserved to be the worst of 2013 it was a huge toss up between this and Movie 43, but I ultimately decided After Earth due to it taking itself way too seriously and it actually having some potential.
15. Jack and Jill (2011) directed by Dennis Dugan : Trust me when I say I wanted to put this movie as the worst of 2011 BADLY, but there was one movie that stopped it dead in it’s tracks which we will get to very soon. Now as for the movie what can be said that really hasn’t been said already? It’s an annoying that tries way too hard to be funny but each and every joke falls flat, the characters are some worst written characters in film. The movie itself feels like it’s 2 hours long, you feel every single minute of the movie. It has no redeeming qualities to it whatsoever and is one of those movies that’s just a disgrace to comedy in every single way possible.
14. Norm Of The North (2016) directed by Trevor Wall : You haven’t seen bad until you have seen the scene where Norm starts dancing to Shut up and Dance by WALK THE MOON in the city and then suddenly a giant dance mob starts. It’s at that moment where you realize you are watching one of the worst things put onto film, all of that aside Norm Of The North is one of the worst animated films out there, from terrible animation to the terrible characters and jokes (painful jokes) it has so much against it. Yet it spawned so many sequels that have previously been on this list, this is the worst out of all of them because this was actually released in theaters…there was no excuse for this movie to be this bad! However this movie originally was supposed to be straight to DVD. That’s the end result when you put a garbage animated movie that was supposed to be on DVD into theaters..
13. The Emoji Movie (2017) directed by Tony Leondis : This is one of the worst things to ever happen to film, it takes such a stupid concept and makes it somehow even worse. Plus it’s basically a ripoff of Wreck it Ralph and Inside Out, what can I even say that has not been said before, the name alone should tell you why it’s on this list. So I’m just going to link my original review of this garbage.. oh yes and this wins “Worst Animated Movie of the 2010s” https://letterboxd.com/jerome1994/film/the-emoji-movie/
12. Smiley (2012) (WORST OF 2012) directed by Michael J. Gallagher : I have seen several worst of the 2010s lists and I am sort of surprised that a lot of them seem to leave out Smiley (on the other hand the advertising was sort of piss poor) anyway this movie is one of the worst horror films I have ever seen. I’m willing to give a lot of horror movies a pass for being silly, but this movie did not even try to be campy. It took itself wayyyy too seriously. Smiley is one of those horror movies you would turn off in less then 2 minutes because it’s about as interesting as watching grass grow, a lot of the movie is just jumpscares….what makes this movie even worse was it actually was in theaters!! It’s cheap looking, horribly acted, written, directed and it has Shane Dawson in it….that just makes it worse..
11. Amityville: The Awakening (2017) directed by Franck Khalfoun : Speaking of disgraces to the horror genre here is another one!! It’s from a series that just needs to die off already, there is really not much to say here. It was delayed 5 times and it is very easy to see why, the acting from everyone involved including Bella Thorne is painful, the writing is some of the worst I have ever heard in a horror film. The movie is filled to the brim of cliches, even if you aren’t a horror fan you can easily predict what’s going to happen. The direction is just lost it feels like nobody had any idea what they were doing and did not care either…
10. The Last Airbender (2010) directed by M. Night Shyamalan : Without going on and on about how much this movie is hated I will keep it very short. Nobody involved clearly had no idea what the source material was, this was a big case of just doing a quick google search and then saying you have seen the source material. It doesn’t help that everything about this movie is dreadful from the acting, writing, directing, the camera shots and more.
9. Cats & Dogs: The Revenge Of Kitty Galore (2010) (WORST OF 2010) directed by Brad Peyton : This is a sequel that absolutely nobody wanted but it happened anyway, everything about this movie is just painful. The jokes are painful, the writing is painful. At least with the first movie it was stupid fun, you don’t get that with this movie at all…What else is there to say?
8. Mean Girls 2 (2011) (WORST OF 2011) directed by Melanie Mayron : This movie insults the original movie so hard. The subtly from the first movie is just gone *poof* this movie isn’t anywhere near as grounded as the first movie. Throughout the movie I couldn’t help but shout “who does this? Who talks like this?” Mandy the villian in this movie is completely unrealistic, the way she acts and how bizarre her plan is just not believable. Oh yeah it doesn’t help that the main character is a “I’m not like other girls” type of girl and the writers are so annoying about it. Almost every scene in the first two acts of the film is constantly reminding the audience “this girl is a badass you should cheer for her!!!” That’s as much as I can do, this movie is complete garbage and doesn’t understand anything about the first movie…..BTW this was shot in 20 days.
7. Martyrs (2016) directed by Kevin Goetz and Michael Goetz : The original french film of the same name that came out in 2008 is one of my favorite films of all time and in my opinion one of the most disturbing films ever made. Of course America had to remake it and completely water it down to a worthless LifeTime quality horror movie, it’s like they missed the point of the original on purpose and could care less. It’s actually rather insulting on how terrible and ignorant this movie really is, the acting is horrendous and doesn’t even compare to the acting in the original movie. Actually nothing about this movie compares the original because it’s garbage!
6. The Darkness (2016) (WORST OF 2016) directed by Greg McLean : I am only ever going to remember this movie by someone saying “that garbage movie that Kevin Bacon was in” with that aside this movie for me is still the worst movie of 2016. It offers absolutely nothing to the horror genre and just does what other horror movies have done except 10x worse. Unimaginative, a wasted cast, horrible CGI, horrendous writing, nothing but jumpscares and cliche after cliche…
5. Fantastic Four (2015) (WORST OF 2015) directed by Josh Trank : I think the ending to this movie really speaks for itself…also what they did to Doctor Doom is unforgivable https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A3Eb0lfjyv0
4. Show Dogs (2018) directed by Raja Gosnell : My original review really says it all but I will say a few things. Since my original review I have seen the scene that was taken out of the movie and it’s disgusting and horrendous, I have no idea what the people involved with this movie were on but good god is it dreadful…second how on earth is this supposed to be a kids movie…? https://letterboxd.com/jerome1994/film/show-dogs/
3. After (2019) (WORST OF 2019) directed by Jenny Gage : Based on a Harry Styles fanfiction that was on Wattpad…..It’s seriously amazing to me how you have a script like in Eighth Grade where Bo Burnham did countless hours of research to perfect his film….and then you have something as horrendous as this. What I’m getting at is this movie was basically a Wattpad (yes a Wattpad) fanfiction of Harry Styles, that’s how low we are apparently heading now. Crap like that should not warrant a movie at all, it’s the same thing when I said Slender Man or any creepypastas have no business in film, fanfiction or horrible internet stories should not be in film period. Enough about that on to the movie, be prepared because holy crap this is one hell of a disaster. So first off the acting in this movie is DREADFUL, I can’t think of a single time during this movie where there was a emotion that wasn’t either crying or a blank face, Hero Fiennes Tiffin was dreadful, Josephine Langford was just as bad and everyone else was just there. The writing is as you would expect horrendous, seeing how this came from a Wattpad story of all places it’s filled with cringy and horrible dialogue that nobody has ever said to anyone. The writing gets even far far worse towards the end of the movie where there’s just no focus at all. It feels like the type of writing where they made it up as they went on, the movie also has next to no plot. It feels like they completely threw the plot right out the window and didn’t give a crap, the characters are absolute pieces of garbage. Not one of them is likable in any sense (except Dylan Arnold’s character but he’s barely in the movie so it doesn’t matter), the fact this movie tries to get to actually feel sorry for the main character is just insane. Like excuse me are you trying to say we should be sympathetic to cheaters? Not to mention that the idiotic decisions the characters make in this movie is absurd, the movie mostly consists of terribly done montages that will make you want to gouge your eyes out. The editing is some of the worst I’ve seen this year and it’s not even close, the movie felt like it wasn’t even 50% complete when it comes to the editing. Oh yeah and the ending well the movie threw that away too, because there is no ending. It just ends all of a sudden and you are left wondering “why did I waste my time on this crap?” Overall After is one of the worst movies of the decade, it gets every single thing wrong on every level. I seriously can’t believe this was given the okay to release, please do yourself a huge favor and stay away from this movie at all costs
2. Slender Man (2018) (WORST OF 2018) directed by Sylvain White : Slender Man is a Creepypasta that was popular back in 2009 so why Sony decided 2018 was a good year to release this movie when Slender Man is no longer relevant I have no idea, but this movie is further proof of why Creepypastas have no business in film and after this disaster I sincerely hope that we don’t get anymore Creepypasta based films (and before anybody mentions Channel Zero I’m talking about FILMS, as a tv show Creepypastas can work.) anyway on to the movie, the director of this film is the guy who did I’ll Always Know What You Did Last Summer (horrendous movie.) anyway whoever Joey King’s agent is seriously needs to be fired, I genuinely felt bad for Joey King she’s much better than this she’s stuck with some horrendous writing. Speaking of the writing….what were they thinking?? It felt like a copied and pasted script from another film, no original thought was put into it at all, oh yes and the movie rips off The Ring and it’s not even clever enough to hide it either, it gets so frustrating at one point because it feels like they knew what they were doing and they did not care at all. The editing is garbage, it’s edited like a terrible early 2000s horror movie the style of the movie is just ugly and comes off as uninspired, but that’s not even the worst part…the worst part is how insulting this movie is to the horror genre, all this movie ever does is jump scares it doesn’t use anything else, it doesn’t use any thrilling moments, it doesn’t use the atmosphere it doesn’t even bother to explore Slender Man’s character. The character origin is uninspired and is very facepalm worth, the disgrace of the ending is honestly one of the worst endings to a film I’ve seen in awhile, not only is it just terrible all together it’s poorly written, poorly acted and is overall a complete mess. The fact this movie was released the same exact year as A Quiet Place, Hereditary, Mandy and a lot of others disgusts me. This movie is nothing more then a cash grab for people who still even remember that Slender Man still exists, when I think of the horror genre I think of films like The Witch, A Quiet Place, It Comes At Night, The Conjuring and a lot of others. What I don’t think of is pieces of insulting crap like this, the movie is a huge mess and tries so hard to make you feel for the characters even though the characters are just typical cliched horror movie characters.
Thank you for reading my list!!! I hope you all enjoyed!!
Jerome Reviews... 