After she nearly drowns, a young woman unexpectedly falls for the small-town lifeguard who rescued her. Based on the novel by Kate Marchant.
Float is directed by Sherren Lee which is her directorial debut.
Is this Wattpad Studios’s best movie thus far? I think so, granted that’s not exactly saying a whole lot but yes Float is an adaption of a Wattpad story by Kate Marchant. If the Wattpad studios logo didn’t show up I probably would have never figured out it was an adaption because honestly this really plays out exactly like a generic romantic drama.
Andrea Bang and Robbie Amell give decent performances and the chemistry between the two is actually quite charming. There’s plenty of cute moments that are just enough to make you actually care about their characters Waverly and Blake. The filming combined with the location ends up giving tons of beautiful shots that compliment the movie quite well and the direction from Sherren Lee is honestly not that bad as there are a few emotional moments between the two leads that are effective.
Everything else unfortunately is very middle of the road, the side characters are really not that interesting and the attempts of humor from them flat out miss. The writing as I said before is very generic romantic drama elements that never get through the “seen it and it’s been done better” atmosphere.
There really isn’t much else to be said here, I definitely think as far as a Wattpad adaption it’s a masterpiece considering the other adaptions (After series, Kissing Booth, Perfect Addiction ect) but as far as a movie in general? It’s on the very bland side of things.
A woman becomes possessed by an evil spirit after she saves the life of her terminally ill daughter.
Skeletons In The Closet is directed by Asif Akbar a director who’s directed a lot of low budget movies such as Astro (2018), Clown Motel (2023), The Commando (2022) and a few others.
Skeletons In The Closet is one of those movies where you look at the cast, watch the movie and then wonder how did this happen? The fact this movie has Terrance Howard, Udo Kier and Cuba Gooding Jr. and it’s this terrible should really say something. This is like if Hallmark attempted to branch into the horror genre this is exactly what you would get. A movie that feels like it’s 2 hours long with horrendous special effects and makeup that make even the lowest budget horror movie on Tubi look like James Cameron’s Avatar (2009).
As far as the plot goes this is a huge disaster, so many different plot points are being attempted to be explored with none of them sticking. There’s one about loss of income due to losing a job, a child with cancer, religious trauma, suicide and so much more. There’s not a single time in this movie where it seems like the movie knows what it’s talking about, it really does seem like the writers (one of which being Terrance Howard by the way) had absolutely no idea what to do with this movie so they grabbed as many topics as possible, threw in some garbage special effects and called it a day.
Not even the performances could save this movie, they are all incredibly wooden which is mainly due to the very poor writing not giving anyone on set to work with. Granted there are a couple hilariously bad moments but those are not enough to warrant this movie a watch.
Skeletons In The Closet is a very confused mess that is by far one of the worst movies so far this year and quite honestly might be one of Shudder’s worst original movies.
The thing Orion fears the most is the dark. When the embodiment of his worst fear pays a visit, Dark whisks Orion away on a roller-coaster ride around the world to prove there is nothing to be afraid of at night.
Orion And The Dark is directed by Sean Charmatz who previously directed a few Dreamworks animation shorts both of which are from the Trolls series (Trolls Holiday in Harmony and Tiny Diamond Goes Back To School)
When I first heard that Charlie Kaufman was going to be a writer for a Dreamworks and Netflix collaboration I was honestly expecting a very watered down film, however to my surprise Orion And The Dark works quite well and is genuinely a really fun film.
The voice acting is incredibly strong here across the board Jacob Tremblay gives a genuinely touching performance, Paul Walter Hauser does a really fantastic job of building the character of Dark and really making the viewer get invested into the character. Angela Bassett is also quite solid here even if she isn’t given the most to do, she still turns in a great performance as always.
The animation is quite beautiful, there’s a really creative mix of 2D and 3D animation tricks that are captivating and help build the world of the film, it also helps the movie move at a steady pace. The writing from Charlie Kaufman is very child friendly yet isn’t afraid to remind the viewer that the film is written by Kaufman, there’s some genuinely sweet messaging that is executed quite beautifully.
I definitely think the film fumbles the ball a bit towards the end that does away with a lot of the simplicity the rest of the movie was building, it sort of overcomplicates itself when it really did not need to. I do appreciate what the movie was trying to do with it’s final act as it was going for something a bit different, but it unfortunately doesn’t completely work and when compared to the rest of the movie it definitely sticks out like a sore thumb.
Having that said Orion And The Dark is a very sweet film that’s a quick and easy watch, it gets the job done for the most part and while not one of Dreamwork’s absolute best work. It’s miles better and far more investing than some other movies in their catalog.
A young boy in San Francisco meets a talking tiger named Mr. Hu and discovers he’s the latest in a long line of guardians who protect an ancient phoenix from evildoers.
The Tiger’s Apprentice is directed by Raman Hui who was the co director of Shrek The Third (2007) and a bunch of other Dreamworks animation short films such as Scared Shrekless (2010), Kung Fu Panda: Secrets Of The Fury Five and a few others. Joining Hui are Young Duk Jhun and Paul Watling.
The Tiger’s Apprentice is about as bland as you can get with a terrible animated movie, outside of the voice cast such as Henry Golding, Michelle Yeoh, Sandra Oh and Lucy Liu there is very little here. The premise is interesting enough but the execution is severely lacking, most of the characters are of course based off of the Chinese zodiac signs the problem here is outside of the Tiger guardian, the others get very little development. Most of the time they crack a few unfunny one liners or jokes and the movie moves on to the next scene.
Speaking of which the pacing is way too fast, the movie starts out with a nice and slow moment that’s genuinely sweet, but the rest of the movie is way too fast when trying to tell it’s story. Due to this we are given no character development from the characters or why we should care about their journey and goals, the animation is fine enough at times but most of the time it just does not look pleasing to look at. Which is a bit of a shame because the use of color is actually quite decent, with certain colors popping out that actually compliment a few scenes decently enough.
Overall The Tiger’s Apprentice is very undercooked that needed so much more time in the oven especially when it comes to the writing, this is the very definition of streaming fodder that will be quickly forgotten about after watching.
Two romantic burnouts, Jane and Will, are immediately drawn to each other at a mutual friend’s wedding. After a disastrous hook up in the coatroom, they spend the next 24 hours trading candid confessions of messy histories and heartbreaks on the off chance that this fling could be the real thing.
Which Brings Me To You is directed by Peter Hutchings director of The Outcasts (2017), Then Came You (2018), Rhymes With Banana (2012) and The Hating Game (2021).
Really don’t have a whole lot to comment on, Which Brings Me To You is one of those “falling in love for a day” type of movies it’s very much like Before Sunrise (1995) granted it’s the not worst clone but it is a very unspectacular one.
Nat Wolff and Lucy Hale do a fine enough job here and actually have some decent chemistry between one another, there’s some genuinely cute moments that really do make you buy that the characters are into each other. But that’s where the movie really ends, the rest of the movie is very generic romantic comedy beats that tell a story we have seen countless times before as well as being done far better elsewhere.
The several stories the two share to each other aren’t very investing and ultimately lead up to a very predictable final act, having that said I wouldn’t say the movie is awful. There was definitely some level of attempt to make this work, as I said before Nat Wolff and Lucy Hale completely make this movie and even though the final act is on the very predictable side it is genuinely cute. I just wish the movie surrounding it was far better.
Which Brings Me To You is available on all VOD platforms.
In 2006, Quawntay “Bosco” Adams plans an ingenious escape from a federal maximum-security prison for the chance to be at his first child’s birth.
Bosco is directed by Nicholas Manuel Pino which is his directorial debut. The movie is based on the memoir of Quawntay Bosco Adams who was sentenced to 35 years in prison for marijuana possession and escaped prison from the help of a woman he met through a lonely-hearts ad.
This is one of those movies where you are better off reading about the true story rather than sitting through the movie. While Bosco isn’t worst prison drama movie out there, as it does have its positives mostly the acting especially from Aubrey Joseph who really gives it all with such a limited script. There’s a couple emotional moments here and there that the movie throws in that actually works fine enough.
The major problem here is the huge lack of development, I’m not entirely sure what they were trying to go for here. But the character development is just nonexistent for a majority of the characters, even Bosco gets little in the way of development until the last 10-15 minutes that are actually development heavy. The rest of the movie is filled to the brim with a lot of common prison drama movie tropes that fail to move the plot forward, it’s also very over-reliant on voiceovers that aren’t really investing.
It’s a shame because I do think Bosco could have made for a genuinely interesting biopic but unfortunately it’s a bit of a mess and really doesn’t have an idea on what it wants to do.
January was a long tiring month, while it wasn’t the absolute worst movie wise (there’s been far worse lineups in the past) it still was incredibly lacking. Luckily February seems a lot better and has some chances to have some really great films!
13. Jennifer Lopez: This is Me Now – February 16th (Amazon Prime Video) – Excited for this one because the trailer is well…very bizarre.
12. Madame Web – February 14th (Theaters) – I’m hoping this is so bad it’s hilarious territory.
11. History Of Evil – February 23rd (Shudder)
10. Bleeding Love – February 16th (VOD)
9. Out Of Darkness – February 9th (Theaters)
8. Suncoast – February 9th (Hulu)
7. Cobweb – February 9th (VOD)
6. Lola – February 9th (VOD)
5. Fitting In – February 2nd (Theaters)
4. Orion The Dark – February 2nd (Netflix)
3. Lisa Frankenstein – February 9th (Theaters)
2. How To Have Sex – February 2nd (Theaters)
1. Drive-Away Dolls – February 23rd (Theaters)
This month I will also be posting my Top 30 Best Films of 2023 list so stay tuned for that!
A creative writing assignment yields complex results between a teacher and his talented student.
Miller’s Girl is directed by Jade Hailey Bartlett which is her directorial debut.
The concept of Miller’s Girl is not new, it’s another Fatal Attraction (1987) type of movie a sub genre that is quite popular The Crush (1993), Swimfan (2002), The Roommate (2011), Poison Ivy (1992) and many others are example of this type story being told several times before. Some of which end up being cult classics like The Crush (1993) while others get forgotten about.
Miller’s Girl is actually quite better than some of the movies I just named but that’s not exactly saying much considering a lot of movies in this genre tend to be quite awful. But I have to say Miller’s Girl actually does have a decent amount going for it.
Jenna Ortega once again shows she’s one of the best actresses currently working today and I really have to give credit where credit is due. She took a script that so many other actors or actresses would have a very hard time making it work but she puts her own style and power into it which really benefits her performance. There’s one particular moment in the movie where this really shows, if the rest of the movie had moments like that I think this would have been far better. Her character Cairo Sweet while not getting the most character development manages to actually be quite interesting, it really makes you wish the movie spent a bit more time exploring her. But I do think for the most part Jenna’s acting really tells what you need to know about Cairo.
Dagmara Dominczyk gives a pretty hilarious performance, she’s quite enjoyable and really makes each scene she’s in more interesting. Martin Freeman is pretty okay here, this is definitely nowhere near one of his best performances but it’s serviceable and gets the job done. The filming is actually not bad here and filming actually compliments the atmosphere that the movie does have pretty well, finally there’s a handful of moments here that are quite enjoyable there’s some dialogue that is so bad it’s kind of hilarious.
When you really get down to it the main problem here is the writing, the movie is not exactly sure what it’s trying to say. It has the material to talk about something important the movie has this whole thing where the movie actually makes you guess whether something happened between Jonathan Miller (Martin Freeman) and Cairo Sweet, was it a kiss? was it sex? The movie does not really tell you which I actually think was a very refreshing move with these types of movies. It’s just a shame that happens within the last 15-20 minutes where the movie is pretty much over at that point.
The rest of the movie is either filled with some not really funny comedic relief, a lot of drawn out scenes that could have easily been cut down and some very questionable editing that was a bit baffling to see. The movie also plays a bit too safe, despite having controversial themes the movie makes the decision of not really doing anything with it’s premise, sure we get one or two glimpses but that’s really about it.
Overall I think Miller’s Girl is not a terrible movie, there’s a lot here that could have made for something truly great. Especially if the rest of the movie was like the last 15-20 minutes I mentioned earlier. I think the movie is fine enough seeing just for the performances some people may get something out of this.
A down-on-his-luck man struggles to find a better life for his family while fighting to free himself of debt. Captivated by the power and glory of the rising Messiah, he risks everything to carve his own path to a divine life, ultimately discovering that the redemptive power of belief may be his only way out.
The Book Of Clarence is directed by Jeymes Samuel who previously directed The Harder They Fall (2021).
The Book Of Clarance is the third movie I’ve seen this month that I appreciate more than I like or dislike it (the other two being Destroy All Neighbors and American Star) there is so much to like with this movie so it’s such a shame that it really does not come together in the end.
The acting is by far the best part about the movie, LaKeith Stanfield while starting off a bit rough does eventually really capture his performance quite well, Omar Sy, Anna Diop and many others do a solid job as well. It’s just such a shame that Clarence/Thomas (played by LaKeith Stanfield) is the only fully fleshed out character, everyone else is either forgotten about or not given a whole lot to work with character development wise.
The biggest problem here is the movie tries to do so many things at once, it’s very clear that it wants to be a parody of biblical epics, the Bible or an even a satire. It constantly switches and really starts to stick out like a sore thumb halfway through the movie, there’s a couple jokes here and there that are decently funny. But unfortunately most of the movie is just not really funny, I can definitely see what they were going for with the humor but due to the writing and comedic timing it just does not land.
Having that said I do think the movie is well made, Jeymes Samuel absolutely does have vision especially when it comes to capturing some really good shots that compliment the story being told. The movie has a stylistic look to it that at the very least gives the movie its own personality.
Overall The Book Of Clarence isn’t a bad movie, but it’s one that could have been so much better. It’s frustrating because with better writing, a more clear goal on what it wants to do and better jokes I think this would have went on to be something of a cult hit.
Jaycen Jennings, a former NFL superstar, agrees to coach a youth football team to avoid serving time in prison.
The Underdoggs is directed by Charles Stone III director of Drumline (2002), Lila & Eve (2015), Step Sisters (2017), Uncle Drew (2018) and a few others.
I’m a bit surprised, The Underdoggs isn’t anywhere near as bad as I thought it was going to be. There is genuine heart put into this that does get lost throughout the movie due to issues I’ll get into in a moment. The concept of the movie comes from The Snoop Youth Football League which was founded by Snoop Dogg it still continues to this day, C.J. Stroud who is the quarterback for the Houston Texans played in The Snoop Youth Football League which is really neat.
Snoop Dogg is quite great here, a lot of his jokes do end up being just saying “mother fucker” over and over again, but he gives a genuinely solid performance and there were moments that got a few laughs out of me. Mike Epps is also not too bad here he gives some decent laughs but unfortunately doesn’t have a whole lot to work with as the movie goes on.
The main flaw here is while the movie does have heart, it’s basically if you took any of those sports movies like Mighty Ducks and made the kids say piss and fuck over and over again, it’s something we have seen so many times before only with extra cursing. Which is kind of the movie’s only joke cursing a bunch of times and hope the viewer laughs. Which ultimately hurts the heartfelt moments and sort of puts into this weird mix of this sports movie that wants to have this heartfelt message and be good for kids but also wants to curse as much as possible.
I will admit some of the back and forth between the adults and kids were genuinely hilarious and is arguably where the movie shined the most, as I said before The Underdoggs is not as bad as I was expecting but that doesn’t mean it’s a good movie. It’s very heavily flawed and repeats a lot of the same beats a lot of sports movies do (minus the swearing) but I do think this isn’t the worst way to spend 96 minutes. There’s some fun to be had here and I do think there is an audience for this one.
The Underdoggs is available on Amazon Prime Video.
Jerome Reviews... 