Pet Sematary: Bloodlines…why was this needed?

In 1969, a young Jud Crandall dreams of leaving his hometown of Ludlow, Maine behind, but soon discovers sinister secrets buried within. Jud is forced to confront a dark family history that will forever keep him connected to Ludlow.

Pet Sematary: Bloodlines is a prequel to the Pet Sematary (2019) remake, I’m one of those few people who actually quite liked the remake obviously not as much as the original. But I did find it to be quite enjoyable and at least interesting, however when a prequel was announced I was not on board. Mainly because part of the charm of Pet Sematary is not knowing where the Sematary itself came from, plus the original and the remake already established quick but interesting backstories that did not need to be expanded upon.

The only positive I can really give here is the filming, there’s some decent shots here which while do not have the atmosphere of Pet Sematary manage to do their own thing. Although the locations are clearly different from the remake so that can be a bit distracting, unfortunately what really kills Bloodlines is three main things….the characters, writing and editing.

Part of what makes Pet Sematary so great is the characters being well written there’s tragedy and emotional connection to the characters that makes the viewer connect to them, Pet Sematary works as a tragedy even if there are some more sillier moments. Bloodlines however doesn’t even attempt to do any of that, the characters in this movie talk about moving away or avoiding each other. Which sure that would be fine if this wasn’t attempting to be a connection to Pet Sematary, it really comes off as an incredible lack of understanding about Pet Sematary and it’s characters.

The writing is painfully dull and really doesn’t offer anything interesting to say or really talk about, like with the characters there’s no emotional connection or tragedy. It’s all just put together in such an uninspired way and somehow makes the story of Pet Sematary seem like a chore to sit through. Finally there’s the editing which combined with multiple bad lines and horrendous pacing it makes the movie seem so much longer than it really is despite only being a 84 minute movie. Even the jumpscares aren’t enough to keep the viewer awake.

Overall Pet Sematary: Bloodlines is terrible and as said before a complete lack of understanding on what makes the story of Pet Sematary so great.

Pet Sematary: Bloodlines is available on Paramount+

1/10 F

Dark Harvest is a mess.

Teens confront a legendary supernatural spectre that emerges from the cornfields of a small Midwestern town every fall.

After many delays since September 2021, Dark Harvest is finally released and it’s not exactly hard to see why this took so long to release.

I can see what director David Slade was attempting here with the movie but unfortunately that all gets lost with tons of bad performances and some very messy dialogue especially towards the end. The first half you can at least get an idea of what’s going on, as it does have some classic Halloween time type of themes that help the movie stand out a bit.

The creature’s design was decent enough but the parts with CGI completely take you out of the movie, honestly what hurts this movie the most is the second half. Which is mostly due to the movie really not focusing on it’s worldbuilding at all, sure we are given the rules but without much exploration of said rules the end result only puzzles the viewer. Events sort of just happen as the movie goes on with little to no context which admittedly can lead to some unintentionally funny scenes but not enough to save the movie.

There’s admittedly some pretty neat gore that I give credit where credit is due, but that’s really about it. Which is a shame because Dark Harvest had everything it needed to be a future cult classic during Halloween time. But with the movie taking itself way too seriously and a completely messy second half, it’s likely that Dark Harvest will be forgotten about.

Dark Harvest available on all VOD platforms.

4/10 D+

Saw X gives the Saw franchise a new direction.

Hoping for a miraculous cure, John Kramer travels to Mexico for a risky and experimental medical procedure, only to discover the entire operation is a scam to defraud the most vulnerable. Armed with a newfound purpose, the infamous serial killer uses deranged and ingenious traps to turn the tables on the con artists.

Saw X is the tenth installment (eleventh if you count Spiral From The Book Of Saw) in the Saw franchise. The franchise has definitely had it’s ups and downs over the years, there’s some quite strong installments in the series such as Saw, Saw II and Saw VI and then you have some on the weaker said such as Saw V and Saw 3D (or Saw The Final Chapter.) With that said I still quite like the series and was excited to see what they were going to do with Saw X and the direction they did take was quite surprising.

Saw X is a direct sequel to Saw and is a prequel to Saw II, the main focus here is John Kramer who is of course played by Tobin Bell who is the best he’s ever been as John Kramer. I was worried initially that they were going to go the Don’t Breathe 2 route and try to make Kramer out to be misunderstood and justify his actions, however that’s not the case here. John Kramer is just the main focus which leads to actually a lot of character exploration and puts up against some equally terrible people as well.

One of which being Cecilia Pederson played by Synnøve Macody Lund who does such a fantastic job of playing one of the most unlikable characters in the franchise, speaking of which the acting this time around is surprisingly pretty great. Tobin Bell obviously steals the show with his performance as John Kramer, his performance here shows just how incredible he is as the character and really works well with the material he’s given. But everyone else in the cast does a solid job in their respective roles.

Saw X does a fantastic job of taking the franchise in a different direction, It does go back to the roots of the first film of the franchise, where it includes suspense and the traps. The first half of the movie is largely focused on John Kramer while the second half is more traditional Saw but still is quite fantastic. The traditional Saw half doesn’t lose anything that the first half established, in fact the two actually work incredibly well together to create such a interesting balance.

The traps and gore are quite gnarly especially combined with the very limited space type of atmosphere, Shawnee Smith returns as Amanda Young who absolutely nails it especially with each of the scenes with Bell and Young together. It really shows how solid the acting really is in this installment.

Overall Saw X is a very strong installment to the franchise, if this is going to be the direction that the series is going take then I’m all in and curious to see what they will do next.

Saw X is currently in theaters.

9/10 A

Quick Review: Scooby-Doo! and Krypto, Too!

Scooby and the gang join forces with Superman’s dog when members of the Justice League mysteriously disappear.

Scooby-Doo! And Krypto, Too! Is yet another Scooby-Doo crossover movie, this time with Krypto and some other DC characters like Lex Luther.

Honestly there really isn’t a whole lot to say here, it’s your typical Scooby-Doo movie that still has the charm and love put into it like many of the others. Scooby-Doo and the gang fit well together with the DC characters and there’s plenty of jokes that are genuinely decent.

Honestly if there’s any major criticism to be made it’s that we have kind of seen Scooby-Doo and the gang team up with DC characters plenty of times before, some comparisons I’ve seen is with the Scooby-Doo Batman Brave and The Bold movie. With that said I do think this movie does it’s own thing just enough to push it to the finish line, it’s a quick and easy watch that might not have anything new going on but it is a solid watch.

Scooby-Doo! And Krypto, Too! is available on all VOD platforms.

7/10 B

Haunted Mansion (2023) is a terrible and forgettable take on Disney’s ride

A woman and her son enlist a motley crew of so-called spiritual experts to help rid their home of supernatural squatters.

Haunted Mansion is another take that’s based on Disney’s theme park attraction ride The Haunted Mansion. The first movie was of course was the 2003 movie The Haunted Mansion, a silly movie that some people still quite like to this day. Haunted Mansion (2023) however? It’s a complete and total mess as well as being one of Disney’s most forgettable releases this year.

Haunted Mansion has a decent cast and they do the best they can with a script that is incredibly limited, LaKeith Stanfield, Owen Wilson and Danny DeVito in particular are decent enough, what holds them back is the script. Between a lot of painfully bad jokes and product placements such as Baskin Robbins, Burger King, CVS and a few others it starts to become a mess that strangely enough makes very little sense.

At least with the Eddie Murphy Haunted Mansion it had some sort of personality and actually knew what it wanted to be, this one wants to go for a darker tone, have product placements and tell unfunny jokes. It’s not like this movie did not have potential either, the New Orleans setting if it were taken advantage there could have been some really strong moments. The characters are given very little in ways of character traits and development, combine that with such a dull plot that moves at a snails pace and you have a chore of a movie to sit through.

I wish there was more to be said but this is the most nothing movie I’ve seen so far this year, it’s a bunch of product placements and a poorly written script crammed together with some talented actors involved.

Haunted Mansion is available on Disney+ and on all VOD platforms.

3/10 D-

The Nun II is slightly better than the first movie.

In 1956 France, a priest is violently murdered, and Sister Irene begins to investigate. She once again comes face-to-face with a powerful evil.

The Nun II is a sequel to The Nun (2018) and is the eighth (ninth if you count Curse Of La Llorona) installment in The Conjuring Universe. I was sort of hoping with Akela Cooper being one of the writers that The Nun II would be a huge improvement over it’s predecessor and while it is better it’s not by much unfortunately.

The best The Nun II has going for it is the acting Taissa Farmiga is quite solid here and Storm Reid is quite fun as well. There’s some interesting shots in the movie that are unfortunately not utilized all that well but there’s times where the movie does have some interesting shots.

The main issue with The Nun II is it’s another forgettable studio horror movie, it’s the same sort of thing as a lot of other religion based horror movies and really does not do anything new at all. The writing in particular is very dull, there were moments where they were trying to bring interesting ideas to the table but just kind of skipped over them in favor of something more familiar.

Most of the movie consists of very predictable jumpscares and often times feels very directionless, like they were not sure how to continue the story of The Nun, the final moments of the movie are sort of fun but by then it’s too little too late.

Not a whole lot else to say here, The Nun II is a tad better than it’s predecessor but it’s still not something I would recommend checking out.

The Nun II is available on all VOD platforms.

4/10 D+

Quick Review: Til Death Do Us Part

After running away on her wedding day, a bride must fight for survival against her vengeful fiance and seven deadly groomsmen. In the ultimate showdown, the groomsmen soon discover that she has no intention of going back to the life she left behind.

Til Death Do Us Part is what happens when you mix Ready Or Not and John Wick then proceed to somehow make it terrible.

Honestly there is very little to be said here because the movie itself just does not care about having a plot that is coherent, the editing is atrocious combined writing that is straight out of a poorly written soap opera. The characters have no personality outside of their character traits, the action is incredibly bland and fails to engage the viewer.

There’s a couple shots here that look fine enough but that’s not nearly enough to save this movie from being a complete and total disaster, it’s a shame because had this movie been campy and took itself way less seriously there could have been some entertainment value here.

Til Death Do Us Part is available on all VOD platforms.

1/10 F

No One Will Save You is a thrilling film about grief and guilt

Brynn finds solace within the walls of the home where she grew up until she’s awakened one night by strange noises from unearthly intruders.

This has probably already been said one hundred times already but No One Will Save You is one of the biggest surprises in 2023, it’s Brian Duffield’s second film he previously directed Spontaneous (2020) which funnily enough was also a huge surprise and ended up being one of my favorites of 2020.

Kaitlyn Dever gives such a powerful performance here, the film itself doesn’t have a lot of dialogue it’s like if you mixed A Quiet Place, The Twilight Zone and 10 Cloverfield Lane together to get this very intense thrilling squished together space. And Kaitlyn Dever absolutely nails it she really brings this powerhouse performance that manages to tell the story through her emotions and actions, it’s truly some impressive work from her that is one of her best performances to date.

The film itself is an alien invasion movie that is much smaller scale and that definitely fits quite well with what the film is going for, remember how I said in my review for Jordan Peele’s Nope that it had a large epic scale too it? Well that’s the opposite here and I don’t mean that in a bad way at all (far from it.) in the context of the story the much smaller scale absolutely fits especially with the camera angles and thrilling atmosphere involved.

There’s a lot of different interpretations that people can make from No One Will Save You a big one being grief and guilt plus how Brynn (played by Kaitlyn Dever) confronts it, the aliens have very humanoid mannerisms that can be a reflection of people from Brynn’s past. It’s truly a very interesting approach to the subject that I’m even surprised was taken. The aliens aren’t even the center focus they are more of a symbol to represent Brynn’s journey and having to overcome that journey.

I highly recommend going into No One Will Save You knowing as little as possible, it’s not going to be for everyone but if it does sound like something you would like I highly recommend giving this one a shot.

No One Will Save You is available on Hulu!

9/10 A

Jules a heartwarming story with wonderful acting!

A man’s quiet life gets upended when a UFO crashes in his backyard in rural Pennsylvania. As he befriends the mysterious extraterrestrial, things start to get complicated when two neighbours discover it and the government quickly closes in.

Jules is yet another pretty big surprise from 2023, I’m sure there’s people out there that will write Jules off as being an ET clone but with old people instead of children, but that’s really not the case. Sure it does have a few similarities with ET but how the films approach the premise are completely different.

Ben Kingsley, Jane Curtin and Harriet Sansom Harris are all fantastic here, they all give hilarious performances with some genuinely touching moments that will make you instantly love these characters. If there’s a theme here it’s being kind or nice, throughout the film we see Milton (played by Ben Kingsley), Joyce (played by Jane Curtin) and Sandy (played by Harriet Sansom Harris) treat Jules (played by Jane Quon) like family and while they do question where Jules came from that doesn’t bother them all that much.

Jane Quon is absolutely incredible here, her performance as Jules is genuinely funny and manages to express emotions without really showing them, there’s something genuinely sweet about Milton, Sandy or Joyce talking about their issues or what’s on their mind to Jules. While Jules might not fully understand what they are saying, but you can tell Jules genuinely cares about the three and actually does help the three learn a bit more about themselves and actually does help them with their issues.

As I said before the approach is much different from ET, Jules is a much smaller film that isn’t quite as big in scale, but that ultimately benefits the film in the long run, it’s a smaller story that really focuses on building it’s characters into something truly special. Characters that the viewer can easily connect with, combine that with excellent acting and writing that is so charming and you have yourself a simple yet very effective story.

Jules is available on all VOD platforms.

9/10 A

Flora and Son is a beautiful film about music and it’s connections.

Single mom Flora is at a loss about what to do with her rebellious teenage son, Max. Her efforts to keep him out of trouble lead to a beat-up acoustic guitar, a washed-up LA musician, and harmony for this frayed Dublin family.

Flora and Son is directed by John Carney a director who is known for his musical drama films such as Begin Again (2013), Once (2007) and Sing Street (2016). Flora and Son might not be that much different than his other films but everything that makes his previous musical drama films so likable is here in Flora and Son.

The performances all around are quite great the standouts being Eve Hewson, Orén Kinlan, Jack Reynor and Joseph Gordon-Levitt. They all deliver emotional and quite touching performances, as well as having beautiful singing voices that deliver some really strong songs including Dubin07 (really caught me by surprise on how catchy it was), Meet in the Middle and High Life all three of which are beautifully put together and fit the film incredibly well.

The story itself is very familiar if you have seen Carney’s previous work which I’m actually okay with, he still has this theme of showing the beauty of music and how it brings us together and much like in his other films he nails that down quite well. We also get to see the theme of crafting music from two people who have different music styles, Flora (played by Eve Hewson) is seen trying to learn about the guitar and likes love songs while her son Max (played by Orén Kinlan) is more into electronic dance music. We get to see two songs that Flora and Max craft and perform together which is some of the film’s best moments.

There’s tons of character moments particularly with the beautiful mother and son drama that Flora and Max have, we get some of Jeff’s (played by Joseph Gordon-Levitt) character development through his interactions with Flora and through his songs as well. Flora and Son is truly a beautiful film that you can tell quite easily had a lot of heart poured into it.

If you liked John Carney’s previous work you are most definitely going to really like Flora and Son!

Flora and Son is available on Apple TV+

8/10 B+