Fingernails (2023)

Anna and Ryan have found true love, and it’s proven by a controversial new technology. There’s just one problem, as Anna still isn’t sure. Then she takes a position at a love testing institute and meets Amir.

I get what they are going for here with Fingernails but unfortunately I don’t think it quite works as well as Yorgos Lanthimos’s films or Charlie Kaufman’s films. Despite that however the movie does have it’s positives. 

The main one being the performances, Jessie Buckley, Riz Ahmed and Jeremy Allen White are all quite fantastic and deliver some very solid performances that are what keep this movie afloat. The film is well made and the atmosphere is definitely there with some scenes in particular being quite hard to watch (fingernail scenes) so there’s definitely something there. 

The main issue here is Fingernails lacks a lot of strong character moments and doesn’t use it’s premise to it’s full potential. Throughout the movie we are told things about the characters but we are never given any real strong moments, the chemistry is strong but the lack of doing anything with it is what pushes this movie to the ground. There’s a few ideas here that the movie gets across fine enough but a lot of it really does come off as trying to be Lanthimos or Kaufman. 

It’s a bit frustrating because you would think there would be a lot to say about Fingernails a movie that was clearly trying to say far more than what was presented, but unfortunately that really isn’t the case here. It’s a movie that wants to say something but doesn’t quite know how to really say it. When the cast are given moments to shine they really hit it out of the park, when it comes to everything else it hits a brick wall.

Fingernails is available on Apple TV+ 

5/10 C

Pain Hustlers (2023)

After losing her job, a woman who’s struggling to raise her daughter takes a job out of desperation. She begins work at a failing pharmaceutical startup, but what she doesn’t anticipate is the dangerous racketeering scheme she’s suddenly entered.

Pain Hustlers is directed by David Yates (bunch of the Harry Potter movies, the Fantastic Beasts trilogy and The Legend Of Tarzan). There is not a whole lot to say here unfortunately, Pain Hustlers is if you took The Wolf Of A Wall Street (2013) and The Big Short (2015) then proceeded to somehow make them bad and completely uninteresting. 

Emily Blunt definitely tries to give it her all and is by far the best part about the movie, she’s held back from giving a very good performance due to the direction from Yates. Chris Evans is quite awful and it’s very baffling to watch, I’m still not exactly sure what he’s attempting with the accent but it completely falls flat immediately when he first appears. 

The main thing that really brings the movie down is the lack of energy, it doesn’t have the energetic feel that The Wolf Of Wall Street did or the interesting dialogue that The Big Short had, Pain Hustlers is stuck in the ground with such a dull script that really doesn’t offer anything new. The running time also seals this movie’s fate with a 2 hour and 3 minute running time that feels so much longer, there’s so much here that could have been interesting but between the dull direction and the terrible script it turns into a huge misfire. 

Pain Hustlers is available on Netflix. 

3/10 D-

Old Dads (2023)

When a middle-aged father and his two best friends sell their company to a millennial, they soon find themselves out of step and behind the times as they struggle to navigate a changing world of culture, career and fatherhood.

Old Dads is basically if you turned that “old man yelling at the sky” meme into a movie, I hadn’t  seen any of Bill Burr’s standup comedy shows before watching this movie. So afterwards I did a little homework and watched a few segments of his shows and well I absolutely understand why even fans of Burr’s shows do not like this movie.

There’s a drastic difference between standup comedy shows and a 104 minute movie, they are two completely different forms of entertainment and that absolutely shows with Old Dads. Outside of the performances from the cast who I did think are really trying to make it work, the jokes fall incredibly flat and it largely ends up being turned into yet another manufactured Netflix comedy. A majority of the movie is about mocking modern culture but then suddenly switches to Bill Burr’s character learning to change which comes out of complete nowhere. 

It really feels like a complete cop out, making all the mocking of modern culture look completely pointless. It doesn’t help that Burr’s direction is just terrible, there’s no style, excitement or anything to get really invested in. This is honestly no different than your usual Netflix comedy except it’s mocking modern culture (wow what a huge difference) 

Old Dads is available on Netflix. 

2/10 F

Dashing Through The Snow (2023)

After a traumatic experience, Eddie Garrick, a social worker, no longer believes in the magic of Christmas. At the request of his estranged wife, he brings his daughter Charlotte to work where a magical adventure begins for them.

There really isn’t a whole lot to say about Tim Story’s latest movie Dashing Through The Snow. It’s the very definition of a forgettable Christmas movie that just sort of exists and has a lot of the exact same problems a lot of modern Christmas movies do. Which mostly consists of slapping a few familiar faces on the movie and not really care about anything else. 

It’s nice to see Ludacris attempt to branch out in different roles other then the Fast and Furious series, however that really doesn’t mean all that much when the writing is painfully dull and really does not have the Christmas spirit at all. Lil Rel Howery Santa could have worked if the material was actually funny, he tries his best with what he’s given but it’s nowhere near enough to save this movie from being a chore to sit through. 

That’s perhaps the biggest problem here, Dashing Through The Snow feels like a very long chore to finish with no actual reward at the end, the characters are very underdeveloped and the journey they go on is just not very interesting at all. I’ll give the movie some points for it’s cast, despite not giving great performances there were some heartfelt moments during the third act that did work. Unfortunately by then it’s too little too late and we have pointless villain subplot (they could have easily went without a villain.)

Dashing Through The Snow is available on Disney+ 

3/10 D-

Dumb Money (2023)

Everyday people flip the script on Wall Street and get rich by turning GameStop into one of the world’s hottest companies. In the middle of everything is Keith Gill, a regular guy who starts it all by sinking his life savings into the stock. When his social media posts start blowing up, so does his life and the lives of everyone following him. As a stock tip becomes a movement, everyone gets wealthy — until the billionaires fight back and both sides find their worlds turned upside down.

Dumb Money is directed by Craig Gillespie who directed Cruella, Lars and the Real Girl, I, Tonya, Fright Night (2011) and a few others. The movie is based on the book The Antisocial Network by Ben Mezrich and chronicles the GameStop short squeeze of January 2021. 

The whole GameStop short squeeze was absolutely insane in just about every way, from the way it happened to what transpired during the whole thing. It was primarily triggered by users of a subreddit called r/wallstreetbets which is part of Reddit. The whole event was spread like wildfire on the internet and for awhile you could not escape the news of the short squeeze, so naturally it was only a matter of time before a movie about it was made. 

Dumb Money is a biopic about the event itself and some of the people involved Paul Dano playing Keith Gill the person the movie focuses mostly around, which leads me to say that the cast is quite great. Dano as always does quite a fantastic job here and really captures this sort of role quite well. Pete Davidson, Vincent D’Onofrio, Anthony Ramos, Myha’la Herrold and Seth Rogen are all quite solid as well. Some of them definitely get more to do than others, but as a group with their talent combined they really hit it out of the park. 

I do have to give the movie some sort of credit that it did handle the topic of COVID actually quite well. Part of Keith Gill (Paul Dano) and his brother Kevin Gill (Pete Davidson) story is that they are suffering from a tragedy that happened because of COVID, the way it’s handled really comes off surprisingly raw and actually makes the viewer feel for the two. It’s some of the best moments of the movie that I wish the movie used the same sort of energy for it’s other characters. 

Because truth be told a lot of the other characters are very underdeveloped, despite having several different plot lines a lot of the characters particularly Anthony Ramos really get the short end of the stick when it comes to development. Which really defeats the purpose of this whole “normal class vs the elite” type of angle, part of what made the whole GameStop situation so interesting is it was a bunch of internet users versus the elite and Wall Street. That sort of feels lost here when a lot of the characters are not given the development they need. 

Despite that however I still do think this is a decently fun movie with some great acting, it definitely leaves a lot to be desired and maybe should have waited a few years before being quickly made. But for people who really can’t understand the whole subreddit or Wall Street in general I do think this is a decent movie. 

Dumb Money is available on all VOD platforms. 

6/10 C+

Foe (2023)

Hen and Junior’s quiet life is thrown into turmoil when an uninvited stranger shows up at their door with a startling proposal.

The main question to ask when talking about Foe is “what happened here?” On the surface this looks like something with a lot of potential you have Garth Davis director of Lion (2016) in the director’s chair plus Saoirse Ronan and Paul Mescal in the leading roles. The plot sounded genuinely interesting as well, it had all the right ingredients to make for a very interesting sci-fi thriller…that’s sadly not the case here. 

Saoirse Ronan and Paul Mescal truly give it their all with their performances which are hands down the best part of the movie, there’s some genuinely strong moments with their chemistry that almost feel accidental due to how quickly the writing completely falls off a cliff. The setup is decent enough, the atmosphere (at least at the beginning) had this eerie feeling that the movie was going for. 

However once the actual plot kicks in the movie starts to become a way too unnecessary convoluted plot that already lost the viewer due to how slow the movie moves, it’s such a chore to sit through and with absolutely no payoff you start to question what exactly was the point. The screenplay doesn’t do the movie any favors, while there are a few decent enough moments the rest of it really does not give Ronan and Mescal a lot of room to use their incredible talent. 

Finally the movie itself is incredibly nonsensical even with the rules the movie establishes it goes against it’s own logic and it’s messaging is absolutely confused. Foe is by far the most disappointing movie I’ve seen so far this year, there was so much potential to make something incredibly great here. 

Foe is available on all VOD platforms.

3/10 D-

Quick Lady (2023)

Anne and her estranged train-wreck of a sister, Jenny, must work together to help cover their mother’s gambling debts. When Anne’s beloved dog is kidnapped, they set out on a wild cross-country trek to get the cash.

Quiz Lady was a bit of a surprise, while it’s not anything to write home about. The movie mostly works due to it’s cast and the second half of the movie. 

Awkwafina (who gives her best performance in quite awhile) and Sandra Oh are what helps this movie get to the finish line, the chemistry between the two is hilarious plus they work so well together on screen that you actually get somewhat invested into their characters. Will Ferrell is also quite decent here, sure he’s mostly just playing a Alex Trebek type of host. But there’s still a bit of charm to his character and Ferrell actually makes his performance work decently well. 

Quiz Lady starts out a bit rough, the first portion of the movie is definitely a “seen that and done better” sort of situation, with a lot of very familiar road trip comedy beats. Luckily the movie does quickly become quite charming and ends up being genuinely funny, there’s some genuinely touching moments Anne (played by Awkwafina) and Jenny (played by Sandra Oh) and the ending does wrap the story up nicely. 

There really isn’t much else to say about Quiz Lady it’s a charming comedy that is pretty straightforward and ends on a decent note, it’s definitely not going to break any new ground but it’s a fun little movie. 

Quiz Lady is available on Hulu. 

6/10 C+

Quick Review: Susie Searches (2023)

Susie is an awkward college student with a failing true-crime podcast. She seizes the opportunity to boost her popularity by solving the mysterious disappearance of Jesse. a campus heartthrob. With her star on the rise, events soon take a dark turn as she digs out the truth and finds herself in over her head.

Susie Searches is if you took Nancy Drew and parts of the whole obsession with true crime some people have and put them together. Not a whole lot to say here but there’s a few things worth mentioning. 

The acting is actually quite decent here, Kiersey Clemons gives a solid performance and is very charming in the leading role. She’s genuinely funny and really fits the role well, Alex Wolff is also quite great and works very well with Clemons. Although Rachel Sennott is only in a handful of scenes she completely steals every scene she’a in, Sennott also works incredibly well with Clemons and the two are truly exciting to watch on screen.

The movie itself is decent enough, admittedly the third act does fall flat a bit due to shifting tones a bit too often, however the mystery itself combined with the movie’s entertaining dialogue makes the movie move at a decent pace that never drags out the plot. Honestly what saves this movie is mostly the charm, the characters have charm to them and the dialogue works incredibly well. 

Susie Searches is available on all VOD platforms.

6/10 C+

Strange Way Of Life (2023)

After twenty-five years, Silva rides a horse across the desert to visit his friend Sheriff Jake; they celebrate the meeting, but the next morning Jake tells him that reason for his trip is not to go down the memory lane of their friendship.

Strange Way Of Life is a short film directed by Pedro Almodóvar (director of Parallel Mothers, The Skin I Live In and many others). Typically I don’t really review short films, but between Almodóvar being in the director’s chair plus Ethan Hawke and Pedro Pascal being in the leading roles I decided to watch and talk a little bit about this one (although there isn’t a whole lot to say unfortunately) 

Ethan Hawke and Pedro Pascal are both quite fantastic here and work incredibly well together on screen, the short itself is shot beautifully and does give a bit of a throwback to the classic western genre which is also welcomed. The many captivating shots and oozing with style is enough for the viewer to explore every shot of the short, there’s a lot of beautiful moments that really shine here as well as some great character moments between Pascal and Hawke. 

The story being told here is quite interesting it’s just a shame that a lot of the potential was missed, the short is 31 minutes long and I don’t think it was enough to really paint the full picture. There’s aspects of the story and characters that are left underdeveloped and the short sort of abruptly ends, had the short been a full length feature or longer I definitely think it would have fixed a lot of the issues that were shown here. 

Despite it’s flaws however I do think it’s a decent short that’s visually strong with some really solid performances. 

Strange Way Of Life is available on VOD Platforms. 

6/10 C+

Nyad is yet another oscar bait biopic.

Sixty-four-year-old marathon swimmer Diana Nyad attempts to become the first person ever to swim from Cuba to Florida.

Nyad is directed by documentary filmmakers Elizabeth Chai Vasarhely and Jimmy Chin who directed Free Solo (2018), The Rescue (2021) and a few others. Nyad is a biopic about Diana Nyad a swimmer who swam around Manhattan in record time in 1975 and then in 1979 she swam from North Bimini, The Bahamas to Juno Beach, Florida. Finally in 2013 she swam from Havana Cuba to Key West, Florida. 

Nyad has the right ingredients to be a very strong movie but unfortunately this is yet another biopic that falls into the Oscar bait category. Oscar bait is a term I do think gets overused especially during the last few years where 80% of the time people call a movie Oscar bait simply because they don’t like it. But the term absolutely applies here, the movie does have it’s positives such as Jodie Foster’s performance which has a lot of heart and once again shows that Jodie Foster can really work with a script even if it’s very lacking. Annette Bening’s performance is a very shocking mixed bag, there is a lot of overacting which to be completely fair Bening does her best with the script she’s given but there is also moments where she really shines which is mainly the scenes with Foster and Bening sharing the screen together these moments are genuinely powerful and really stick to the viewer throughout the movie. 

The writing is the main issue here, as I said before Bening and Foster do their best with the script that does lead to some good results. But a lot of the time you would think you are watching a soap opera and not a very good one, the way the movie jumps from scene to scene is quite baffling and has a huge “made for tv” type of feel that unfortunately really bogs down the movie. The other part of the problem is Nyad isn’t much different than your traditional sports biopic, it has very similar beats that at this point many people can quickly recognize. 

Which is honestly quite a shame because Diana Nyad’s story is very interesting and her story can be absolutely told well, but unfortunately that’s not the case here with this movie. It’s also quite odd that Vasarhely and Chin are in the director’s chair, while I do appreciate them trying something out of their comfort zone but Nyad could have easily been a documentary and would have gotten the same message across.

Nyad is available on Netflix. 

5/10 C