Yes God Yes, The Painted Bird and The Secret Dare To Dream (2020)

After an innocent AOL chat turns racy, a Catholic teenager in the early 00s discovers masturbating and struggles to suppress her new urges in the face of eternal damnation.

Yes God Yes is a horny version of Lady Bird, that’s not a bad thing either! There’s a lot working for this movie, first off Natalia Dyer as the leading role does a fantastic job and brings a very raw performance. It’s one of those performances in a coming of age film that you can relate to pretty easily, the direction is really well done from Karen Maine who gives a realistic feel to the movie. The writing was very solid there were tons of character study moments with Alice the main character, which I feel is when the movie was at it’s best. It really makes you feel for Alice and develops her character throughout the movie quite well, I do wish the movie could have added a little bit more to some of the other characters. But overall Yes God Yes is a very solid movie with a lot to like about it, definitely check this one out.

7/10 B

A young Jewish boy somewhere in Eastern Europe seeks refuge during World War II where he encounters many different characters.

This is going to come as a huge shock, but I was not a fan of The Painted Bird. I will say the use of black and white was great and the filming was very strong as well. The major problem I have with this movie however is the running time combined with the pacing, it’s way too slow and feels like a chore to sit through. The movie also does feel like a not very good version of “Come And See” which is a movie that is very hard to recreate or attempt, it is unfortunate because somewhere in this movie there is a good movie. It’s just struggling to be free from the slog fest, acting wise it’s pretty decent but leaves a lot more to be desired…

5/10 C

A widow struggling to get by meets a stranger who subscribes to a philosophy of positive thinking.

The Secret Dare To Dream is the end result when you get a even worse version of a Nicholas Sparks adaption movie. What do I even say about this movie? It does every single thing that every Nicholas Sparks movie does except much worse, Katie Holmes is for whatever reason in this movie which is probably good for this movie because she’s the only good thing about this garbage. Otherwise the acting is terrible it’s the type of acting you would see in a Lifetime movie, the writing is horrendous and some of the most cliched schlock you will witness this year. This is the type of movie that feels so manufactured by doing absolutely nothing to separate itself from other movies like it, at least with some of the Nicholas Sparks movies like The Last Song or Dear John they had some sort of likability to them. This movie doesn’t have that at all avoid this garbage at all costs!

1/10 F

The Kissing Booth 2 (2020)

In the sequel to 2018’s THE KISSING BOOTH, high school senior Elle juggles a long-distance relationship with her dreamy boyfriend Noah, college applications, and a new friendship with a handsome classmate that could change everything.

The fact that I subjected myself with this movie and somehow was able to finish this movie in one sitting is truly amazing, look the first Kissing Booth I thought was bad but not as bad as a lot of people made it out to be. I definitely saw far far worse, this however was just inexcusable…not only is the acting and writing even worse but this movie doubles down on the whole “writers have no idea how actual teenagers talk like” I was certainly not ready for some of the worst lines I think I’ve heard this year. A lot of it feels out of touch, ridiculous and not investing at all. I mean “personal jungle gym” really?!? I seriously hope Joey King was payed good money for this, the worst thing about this movie is the running time…somebody please explain to me how and why is this movie 2 hours and 11 minutes, the first movie was an hour and 50 minutes still too long but you know what at least it wasn’t 2 hours. The pacing is even worse in this movie, just when you think it’s about to wrap and come to a close there is still 30-40 minutes left. Lastly the main character is unlikable everything she says and does make her come off more and more unlikable, it’s mostly due to her decision making and how poorly written she is. Overall The Kissing Booth 2 is a waste of time, please skip this one at all costs!!

Disgrace To Cinema F

Palm Springs (2020)

When carefree Nyles and reluctant maid of honor Sarah have a chance encounter at a Palm Springs wedding, things get complicated as they are unable to escape the venue, themselves, or each other.

Palm Springs takes the time loop subgenre and does something completely different with it, which is very refreshing to see, it also helps that the movie itself is quite strong as well. You have some very strong performances from everyone, the writing is very well done and actually has quite a lot of smart moments that really make it standout. Andy Samberg and Cristin Milioti both gave really strong performances as well as the rest of the cast and the humor is genuinely funny as well. There’s a lot of moments here that not only is the humor used well it’s used in a very creative way, the movie also takes some turns that quite frankly I did not see coming at all and it’s very unexpected from a film like this. The setting of the movie combined with the cinematography lead to many beautiful moments that are mesmerizing to look at, I don’t want to give much else away so I’ll stop here. But Palm Springs is definitely one of the best of the year so far, watch this one when you can!

10/10 A+

Greyhound, The Game Of Death and Desperados (2020)

Early in World War II, an inexperienced U.S. Navy captain must lead an Allied convoy being stalked by Nazi U-boat wolfpacks.

Greyhound is one of those movies that has a lot of great technical stuff like the action scenes, sound effects, filming and so on but not so good acting (with the exception of Tom Hanks and maybe a few others), writing, character development ect. The action scenes combined with the sound is definitely when the movie is at it’s high point, they are really effected and standout from this mess. Tom Hanks gives a fine performance but it isn’t something I would call amazing or even solid. The major problem here is the character development…it’s nonexistent which is a huge problem especially in a war movie. Where the characters are a very heavy focus without development you lose an attachment and when something terrible happens you aren’t going to feel anything towards any of the characters. The writing is very weak and really doesn’t do a whole lot to help the movie stand, it’s quite honestly some of the most simplistic and forgettable writing I’ve heard so far this year. Filming is definitely strong at least the movie has a very decent look to it which is nice, but as I said the many problems with this movie stick out like a sore thumb. Overall Greyhound is not something I would recommend, unless your a war movie fanatic.

4/10 D+

Kill or be killed is the golden rule of the Game of Death. Sucks for seven millennials who ignored that rule. Now each one’s head will explode unless they kill someone. Will they turn on each other to survive, or will this sunny day be the last for the innocent people of their middle-of-nowhere town?

Game Of Death took way too long to come come out in America and I can easily see why, this is one of those movies where the idea of the movie is far better than the actual film itself. The only thing I can give this movie is a handful of unintentional laughably bad moments that made me burst out laughing. Everything else is garbage, I can not honestly tell which is worse the acting or the writing. It’s filled to the brim of cliches and really doesn’t do anything good, a lot of the movie is stuff you have seen in better movies. The characters are pretty much stock horror movie characters, if you have seen any given horror movie congratulations you are going to know exactly what these characters are like. Overall I really don’t know what else to say. It’s a waste of potential and just a downright terrible movie.

2/10 F

A panicked young woman, with her reluctant friends in tow, rushes to Mexico to try and delete a ranting email she sent to her new boyfriend.

Desperados is a movie I only watched because I heard how bad it is, heck I haven’t even heard of it until the reviews came out. It’s bad as everyone saying it is, it’s an edgy Netflix original comedy. The movie is filled to the brim of Pedophillia jokes, the rest of the humor completely falls flat. None of it is funny at the slightest there’s this one scene where a dolphin humps the main character and slaps her with it’s genitals or the movie implies it. This movie really just feels like a Netflix comedy that some how turned into an edgy comedy. It really doesn’t make a whole of sense what the mindset was when making this movie. The acting is terrible, the writing is formulaic and just horrendous. There really isn’t much else to say if it weren’t for that Dolphin scene nobody would know this movie existed, which is saying something because a lot of people already don’t know it exists.

Disgrace To Cinema F

Feel The Beat, The Beach House, The Clearing and Scare Package (2020)

After failing to find success on Broadway, April returns to her hometown and reluctantly is recruited to train a misfit group of young dancers for a big competition.

While this may not be in a filmmaking standpoint be considered “good” I do think it accomplishes what it was set out to do and for what it is the movie is definitely not bad. Sofia Carson definitely does a pretty good job in her role and the child actors are actually not that bad either. Sure the movie is filled to the brim of cliches, just think of any dance movie from the 2000s and early 2010s combine that with dance moms and you have this movie. The plot is predictable and the writing isn’t anything new but as I said before the movie gets the job done. It’s a very harmless movie that it’s a good time waster.

6/10 C+

A romantic getaway for two troubled college sweethearts turns into a struggle for survival when unexpected guests – and the surrounding environment – exhibit signs of a mysterious infection.

5/10 C

A father must battle his way through the zombie apocalypse to save his daughter.

If I didn’t know what year this came out of and someone came up to me and told me “this is from 2020” I wouldn’t believe them. This movie looks like it’s a zombie movie straight out of the early 2000s and worst of all a terrible straight to DVD zombie movie from the early 2000s. I feel like my biggest problem with this movie is that it’s another zombie movie that just doesn’t add anything new to the genre. It has every cliche in the book, granted there are some fun parts in the movie. Some of the kills are pretty okay and there some unintentionally funny scenes, but that’s really about it. The acting is terrible, the writing is even worse and the filming feels worthless.

2/10 F

Chad, the owner of Rad Chad’s Horror Emporium, recounts a series of bone-chilling, blood-splattered tales to illustrate the rules of the horror genre to his newest employee.

Scare Package actually brings a lot of problems to light I have with recent horror anthologies, a lot of them like to take the “meta” route which can be done well. Except in this case it really isn’t done well at all, with the exception of some moments I thought were genuinely clever. The rest of the movie feels like the exact same thing over and over again, which is a huge problem when your doing an anthology movie and probably what you want to avoid, I can tell the passion was there but unfortunately the execution wasn’t. Acting, writing and directing wise it really isn’t good I have definitely seen far far worse there are some moments again that I found pretty okay. But otherwise it just really doesn’t do much, which is a shame this movie could have been good but it didn’t really execute it’s ideas well. That’s another common problem I have with horror anthologies is a lot of them tend to have very good ideas but don’t fully execute the ideas. Scare Package is definitely one of those movies, unless your a horror anthology fanatic I don’t recommend this movie.

3/10 D-